Another mouse has taken over my room!!! This one is fat and slow (I have Christened it Kieran). I almost caught it with my hands last night! (and if i did, I would have screamed like there is no tomorrow) Does anyone know of a good exterminator?
In other news, I nearly died when I read this in MX - the free newspaper.
In short, a former US judge has been chagred over indecent exposure- for using a penis pump WHILE he was presiding over a trial. I have heard of eccentric members of the judiciary, but this guy is the king.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Resident Mouse
Even though my blog is named 'Head banging mice", I don't actually have a thing for the small, fury creature. But it seems as late, an ambitious mouse has decided to abandon its humble home out in the garden and leave its vermin family behind. It moved into the jungle that is my room (where it has lots of places to hide and food bits to nibble on).
At first, I rather resented this territorial invasion and its perpetual rustling that kept me awake at night. I've slept with the blanket over my head for the last week. Then one night, as I laid awake reading, I notice it standing on my bedside table, not 10 inches away from my face. SHOCK! HORROR!!! But then it just looked at me while I stared back. We maintained eye contact for about a minute, then it quietly retrieved back into the folds of papers that litter my floor. I felt a connection. We were connected. We had an understanding. I even named him Ted!
Then Ted went missing for 2 nights. I laid awake again, this time wondering where he got to. Did he decide the City wasn't for him? Did he run back to the bossom of his family, in a subterranean burrow somewhere beneath my garden? Did he not love me anymore?
I found Ted's mangled body in the kitchen this morning, twisted in the metal of the mouse trap. THe temptation of cheese was too strong for Ted. Today is officially a day of mourning. I wonder when another brave, lonesome mousy soul will take up the vacant post as my roommate. Lest we forget!
At first, I rather resented this territorial invasion and its perpetual rustling that kept me awake at night. I've slept with the blanket over my head for the last week. Then one night, as I laid awake reading, I notice it standing on my bedside table, not 10 inches away from my face. SHOCK! HORROR!!! But then it just looked at me while I stared back. We maintained eye contact for about a minute, then it quietly retrieved back into the folds of papers that litter my floor. I felt a connection. We were connected. We had an understanding. I even named him Ted!
Then Ted went missing for 2 nights. I laid awake again, this time wondering where he got to. Did he decide the City wasn't for him? Did he run back to the bossom of his family, in a subterranean burrow somewhere beneath my garden? Did he not love me anymore?
I found Ted's mangled body in the kitchen this morning, twisted in the metal of the mouse trap. THe temptation of cheese was too strong for Ted. Today is officially a day of mourning. I wonder when another brave, lonesome mousy soul will take up the vacant post as my roommate. Lest we forget!
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
The OED on the word 'FUCK'
Perhaps one of the most interesting and colourful words in the English language today is the word "fuck". It is the magical word, which, just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.
In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was Fucked by John). It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck) passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck), and adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck).
It can also be used as an interjection (Fuck! I'm late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, fuck she's also stupid).
As you can see there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word fuck.Aside from its sexual connotations, this word can be used to describe many situations:
1. Greetings.................."How the fuck are ya?"
2. Fraud......................"I got fucked by the car dealer."
3. Resignation................"Oh, fuck it!"
4. Trouble...................."I guess I'm fucked now."
5. Aggression................."FUCK YOU!"
6. Disgust...................."Fuck me."
7. Confusion.................."What the fuck...”
8. Displeasure................"Fucking shit man..."
9. Lost........................"where the fuck are we?"
10.Disbelief...................."UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE !"
11.Retaliation.................."Up your fucking ass!"
12.Apathy......................."Who really gives a fuck?"
13.Suspicion...................."Who the fuck are you?"
14.Directions..................."Fuck off."
It can be maternal........"MOTHERFUCKER!!"
It can be used as every word in a sentence..... "Fuck the fucking fuckers!"
It can be used to tell time......." It's four fucking twenty!"
It can be used as an anatomical description......"He's a fucking asshole."
Lastly, it has been used by many notable people throughout history:
"What the fuck was that?" ~Mayor of Hiroshima
"That's not a real fucking gun." ~John Lennon
"Where the fuck is all this water comin from?" ~Captain of the Titanic
"Who the fuck is gonna find out?" ~Richard Nixon~
"Heads are gonna fucking roll." ~Anne Boleyn~
"Any fucking idiot could answer that." ~Albert Einstein
"It does so fucking look like her!" ~Picasso~
"You want what on the fucking ceiling?" ~Michaelangelo~
"Fuck a duck." ~Walt Disney~
"Houston we Have a big fucking problem." ~The crew of Apollo 13~
In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was Fucked by John). It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck) passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck), and adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck).
It can also be used as an interjection (Fuck! I'm late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, fuck she's also stupid).
As you can see there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word fuck.Aside from its sexual connotations, this word can be used to describe many situations:
1. Greetings.................."How the fuck are ya?"
2. Fraud......................"I got fucked by the car dealer."
3. Resignation................"Oh, fuck it!"
4. Trouble...................."I guess I'm fucked now."
5. Aggression................."FUCK YOU!"
6. Disgust...................."Fuck me."
7. Confusion.................."What the fuck...”
8. Displeasure................"Fucking shit man..."
9. Lost........................"where the fuck are we?"
10.Disbelief...................."UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE !"
11.Retaliation.................."Up your fucking ass!"
12.Apathy......................."Who really gives a fuck?"
13.Suspicion...................."Who the fuck are you?"
14.Directions..................."Fuck off."
It can be maternal........"MOTHERFUCKER!!"
It can be used as every word in a sentence..... "Fuck the fucking fuckers!"
It can be used to tell time......." It's four fucking twenty!"
It can be used as an anatomical description......"He's a fucking asshole."
Lastly, it has been used by many notable people throughout history:
"What the fuck was that?" ~Mayor of Hiroshima
"That's not a real fucking gun." ~John Lennon
"Where the fuck is all this water comin from?" ~Captain of the Titanic
"Who the fuck is gonna find out?" ~Richard Nixon~
"Heads are gonna fucking roll." ~Anne Boleyn~
"Any fucking idiot could answer that." ~Albert Einstein
"It does so fucking look like her!" ~Picasso~
"You want what on the fucking ceiling?" ~Michaelangelo~
"Fuck a duck." ~Walt Disney~
"Houston we Have a big fucking problem." ~The crew of Apollo 13~
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